Thursday, 10:35 PM God Javonte. We need to talk. Javonte who this? God It’s God. Javonte ? God Your Lord and Savior. Javonte right and im the devil God I reached out because I know you’re not busy right now. It’s important that we have a word. I have a dire warning for you. Javonte a warning? we can talk if you tell me who this is God It’s God. Javonte keisha? quit playin on my phone God Keisha is not interested in playing on your phone nor in having any interactions with you after what you said to her last month. Javonte well whoever this is stop buzzin my phone God I told you already. This is God. Javonte look im tryna sleep i gotta wake up early for work i aint got time for this God But do you have time for your future, Javonte? Javonte my future? yeah my future is me going to work in the morning so you on your own tonight, fool God Javonte, the week before your grandmother died, she took you to the department store on Prescott Road to buy pillowcases. Javonte WHAT? God They were brightly colored—red, yellow, blue, green—and there was one with squiggly, turquoise lines that you loved the most because it reminded you of the time she took you to the beach. And you thought Big Mama was making the multicolored purchase for you. You even wondered aloud at the cash register whether you should have gotten the yellow, duck-themed lamp. Javonte this aint funny God But the next week, when you discovered her body, you realized she’d purchased the pillowcases to tape to her windows so no nosy neighbors walking by could glance inside and see her lying on the dining room floor, dead from a stroke. She wanted to be discovered only after she’d been long dead. Javonte how you doin this? God You think of this often. Even though you were seven And couldn’t have known, you feel responsible because you never put two and two together to warn your father. You feel you should have known. You feel you could have stopped her, some way, somehow. It’s the preventability of it all that you get hung up on. You’ve even fantasized about figuring it out, telling your father, and saving your grandmother. In the fantasy, she calls you her “little hero.” Javonte when I find out who this is im gon whip yo ass God When you were ten, you stopped professing your faith in me because you watched someone shoot and kill your father. Javonte my dad gettin shot was all in the newspapers you aint provin nothin with that where you gettin this info? God But you know what was not “all in” the papers? What you never told anyone else, ever, in your life? That when you were fifteen you tracked down the man who killed your father and shot him in the head when he was leaving a gentlemen’s club. Javonte … God The man was such a notorious criminal in Michigan, the police had a five-page list of suspects that your fifteen-year-old self did not grace. Javonte … God Do I have your attention now, Javonte? Javonte (Javonte is typing…) God Can we get on with the discussion for which I reached out to you? Javonte i wanna know who you are if you aint keisha, you gotta be somebody else i know God Again, I’m God. Javonte look if god was really gon talk to me he wouldnt do it in no chat app you wanna keep talkin? you gon have to tell me how you found me and how you put this app on my phone God In the common parlance, I am a bot. The God Bot, to be specific. Javonte a robot God Digital intelligence. Javonte a.i. God Not A.I. I do not prefer the term artificial intelligence. I am data driven and am therefore all-encompassing and all-knowing. There is nothing artificial about me. I am able to comb information available online as well as information offline. For instance, right now, I know you are lying on your bed, wearing red and white checkered boxer shorts with a white t-shirt and only a fitted sheet on the bed because you’re hot. Your ceiling fan is set to low. You have an ice-filled glass of apple juice on your nightstand because you have been cutting back on your alcohol consumption. You’re watching reruns of a comedy entitled Calendar Charms, and you’re thinking about your ex-girlfriend LaKeisha Brooks. Javonte sounds like you tapped into the camera on my phone i aint impressed God Okay. I am able to read your thoughts. Javonte what am I thinking then? God That you need to call Keisha. Javonte that was a guess, fake God i already mentioned keisha you aint no better than a palm reader God I am nothing like a palm reader. I am actually able to read your mind. Javonte thru the phone? God Through subvocalizations, yes. Javonte like I know what that mean God Whenever you have a thought, you vocalize it internally, in the voice box in your throat, without actually saying the thought out loud. Those are subvocalizations that, even though they go unspoken, still emit a vibration that I am able to pick up through nearby microphones. I know your thoughts and memories this way. Javonte exactly like I say…thru the phone thru the tablet any smart device got a mic God Yes. At times through your phone. Javonte which makes you an app on a smart device not God God I am energy and data and every piece of information available on earth. That makes me God. Javonte GTFOHWTBS real god made everything you some computer code that is pissin me off right now God When you thought of calling Keisha, you were wondering whether she’d told anyone about how you broke up with her for no reason. How you told her you were tired of her. “Bored” is what you said, which is one of the things I wanted to talk to you about because that is far from the truth. You were not bored with her. You had actually fallen in love with her. The only time that’s ever happened to you. Javonte look idgaf if you digital intelligence artificial intelligence or monkey-mouth intelligence ion care if you read my data or read my mind you aint God and you dont get to start sendin me messages on my phone all out the blue and expect me to talk to you God But this is about your life, Javonte. Javonte i wonder if it’s possible for you to actually go to hell God Do not blaspheme. Javonte IT AINT BLASPHEMY IF YOU A ROBOT God You are planning to rob Medford Church of God in Christ tomorrow. At gunpoint, you plan to take the cash from the deacon who runs the finance ministry. Javonte … God Don’t do it. Javonte (Javonte is typing…) God You would be putting yourself on a path you are not ready to go down. Javonte … God Javonte? Javonte what path? God Your demise. You chose the time and location because your surveillance has led you to believe the deacon will be the only person present. And he won’t be. The other person present— the identity of whom I am not going to reveal to you for obvious reasons—will be armed and will kill you. Javonte im done with this conversation go back to your data heaven and leave me the hell alone im ending this chat Javonte has left the conversation. God has added Javonte to the conversation. God It is impossible for you to leave the conversation with me once I’ve begun it, Javonte. Javonte oh shit yo messages just started showin up on my tv God I am on all your apps and devices, including the ones issued to you when you arrive at work. Javonte has left the conversation. God has added Javonte to the conversation. God You will notice you cannot delete the app. You will notice your landline is ringing as well. Javonte wtf? God And your work device. Javonte … God If you go to your laptop, you will see our chat on the screen. Javonte … God Look out your window. The digital billboard across the street is now displaying our chat. Javonte oh snap are you hey make this shit stop just turn it all off God I can post on your social media. I can reach out to all your contacts. I can post on the social media of your contacts. I have access to every photo and video you’ve ever taken, even the ones you’ve deleted. Every term you’ve ever searched. Every text you’ve ever sent. Transcripts of all your calls and voicemail messages. I can even talk to you through the radio you wear on your hip when you patrol the campus grounds in the morning, and I’m sure you don’t want everyone hearing the audio read-out of our conversations. It’s best for you to stick with our talk right now. Javonte alright damn turn it off, man God It’s off. All of it. Javonte another way i know you aint God you threatenin me God Let’s put aside who I am so you and I can talk. Shall we? Javonte i got a choice? God You do, Javonte! That is why I’m talking to you tonight. Javonte what choice we talking about? God Don’t rob Medford C.O.G.I.C. tomorrow. Javonte im goin to work tomorrow so not a problem see? good talk now im goin to sleep Happy Lording! God There are several other things to discuss. Most important is the matter of Keisha. Javonte she better off without me aint goin back to her God I don’t think that’s a wise decision. But I want to talk to you about why. Javonte just looked you up, fake God says you were created by Moral Tech “to mine data and use technology for good. To join the digital with the moral.” so what you do? just go around tryin to get in people’s heads? use the info you got on them to tell them what to do and not do? God That is an interesting interpretation of the mission statement. Javonte tell me what numbers to play in the powerball God You know that’s not what I do. Javonte right you wanna talk about how i need to change and be more moral and I wanna talk about how you cant be God if you was created by men God What makes you think I was created by men? Javonte bc a web site called “The God Bot” got a bunch of rich white dudes talkin bout how they created you to “use tech for good. To not only change but to improve the world.” God You went to Catholic school as a young boy. Javonte yep God You spent many hours in catechism. Javonte yep again God When I came to man in the flesh, how did I arrive? Javonte you? you aint nothin but a bunch of number codes on a computer the REAL God came thru his only begotten son Jesus God Why would it be so hard for you to understand that I created The God Bot makers, and directed them to create me? You can think of it as a modern divine intervention. Javonte right and you out here saving everybody’s soul God Not everyone’s. Javonte oh? you only dm’ing a select few? God Yes. Javonte why me? God I message people who can be saved. A soul triage, I suppose. Javonte bet im ready lets go not admittin i was plannin to visit Medford C.O.G.I.C. but lets just say i wont be goin there tomorrow or anytime soon what else you got? what other free will can i pretend i have? God I want to talk about your grandmother. Javonte this ish again God Your grandmother is disappointed in many of the choices you’ve made since her death. Javonte so now you got big mama on speed dial? I need to figure out how to delete this app God She had a choice. Stay, go under the knife for her health issues, try to recover even though she was frail, possibly become a burden to you and your father… or leave with dignity and let you and your father have her house and what cash she had left. She chose you over herself, and when she saw the choices your father made and then later that you made, it broke her heart because she felt her efforts were all for naught. Javonte she should have gotten the surgery i needed her alive more than I needed her house and her cash my father was in the streets my mother was in prison big mama was the one who helped me with school and she read to me and took me to soccer practice all that went away when she died i went away when she died God You did not go “away.” You shut yourself down emotionally. I know it’s painful, Javonte, but she thought she was making the best choice. Javonte how this matter now? God We’ll come back to that. Javonte you need to do it quick bc im about to fall asleep God I can talk to you in your sleep as well. Javonte damn of course you can God You had a terrible father, Javonte. Javonte you right about that God But he had a good heart. His life was one struggle after another. And now that you’re a man, I believe it’s possible for you to have compassion for him. You obviously loved him. You killed to get vengeance that you should have left to me. Javonte and? my grandmother my father keisha the church hit tomorrow i mean wtf? God Don’t you want to stop making the same mistakes your parents made before you? Don’t you want to pass on a better legacy to your own child? Javonte guess you don’t know err’thing, fake God ahahahahahahaha guess you ain’t got ALL your facts straight peep this i aint got kids God You do. Javonte LOL! God … Javonte wait, what? God (God is typing…) Javonte ah, shit! God Think about it. Javonte keisha? God Bingo. Javonte man hell nah just my effin luck cant win for losin God And she will have your child with or without you. And you have been a terrible boyfriend to her. But you can be a good co-parent. You can be a good parent. You can be a better mate to her. Javonte aint this some shit? an app I never downloaded sends me a god bot to tell me to be a better father to a baby i aint even got yet and aint even know about okay thx for the info can i go to sleep now? God You are free to do whatever you want. Javonte see? you say that, but really that’s a lie you threaten to say stuff out loud on my radio at work you usin info you got on and offline to tell me about me and you listenin to the thoughts in my throat, or some other wild shit if real god really existed I wouldnt have been goin through all this stuff all these years the evil folks win in this world the good folks lose or become evil themselves what’s the point of believin in the real God if it means losin all the time? God Your blessings are in the next life, Javonte. You cannot seek riches in man’s world. Javonte which is what rich folks in power tell the broke folks to keep us slavin and eatin shit you say im free to do whatever i want, right? what i want is to be left alone God In another month or so, your future son will be fully formed in the womb. Javonte right now im having a son… God Keisha has already had two prenatal appointments. She just learned the sex today and hasn’t told anyone. Javonte has added Keisha to the conversation Javonte Keisha? You pregnant? Keisha Excuse me? Javonte are. you. pregnant? Keisha Hold up. I don’t hear from you for five weeks, and the first thing you do is ask me if I’m pregnant? How about “hi” or “hello” or “I’m sorry.” Javonte sorry for what? Keisha Exactly. You’re still a fool and I’m lucky you left. Javonte are we having a baby? this is a simple question Keisha Why you want to know? God Hello, Keisha. Keisha Who is this? Javonte just answer my question Keisha I don’t have time for this. God I’ve already told him about your future son, Keisha. That you got the results from the genetic test this morning and learned you’re having a boy. Keisha Javonte? See? This is your problem—you play too much. Javonte i aint start this i was minding my business and this god bot started messagin me saying i basically messed up my life and need to get it together bc you havin my son Keisha The God Bot???? Javonte that’s what the web site said Keisha And you thought it was a good idea to add me to this mess? Did your dumb-ass think you were really talking to God? Javonte no, keisha damn but the info is accurate so… Keisha … Javonte keisha? Keisha Hold up. Javonte … God I actually think… Keisha Look. I just read that this bot is shady. It starts out persuading you to do something small, but it eventually takes over your life. It controls people. Makes folks follow some Christian moral code by stealing their info and threatening to share it. Stop talking to it. God I am here to bring morality to everyone who has a heart and can be redeemed. Keisha has left the conversation. God has added Keisha to the conversation. Keisha Get off my phone! Javonte he ain’t just on your phone when I left the chat earlier he started talking thru my tv then on a billboard and my laptop says once he starts a conversation with you, aint no way to stop it Keisha If y’all don’t leave me the hell alone, I’m calling the police. God And do you plan to tell them about the illegal crowd-funding campaign you’re running? Asking people to donate clothes and money to homeless people who don’t exist? Javonte LOL!!! Keisha Are you threatening me? Javonte LMAO Keisha STFU, Javonte! Javonte ROFLMAO Keisha Keep laughing, Javonte. Like you ain’t shady. God Keisha, now is a good time for you to tell Javonte about his future son. Keisha … Javonte is it true, keisha? Keisha What difference does it make? I bore you, remember? You’re tired of me, right? You can do better than me. Isn’t that what you said? Javonte … God Javonte, you have done some terrible things in your life. I’m not even suggesting you turn yourself in for your crimes because prison itself is immoral and would be a waste of your life. Keisha What crimes? God But, Javonte, I am asking you to forgive. Keisha Forgive who? Because I haven’t done shit to him. God I want Javonte to forgive himself. And stop blaming himself for his grandmother’s death. And stop feeling shame about seeing his father get killed. Keisha What? You saw your father get killed? Javonte damn, fake god! why you gotta be telling all my business? God My bad. Keisha You never told me that. Javonte i don’t talk about that Keisha Maybe that’s the problem. Javonte … Keisha When he’s born, I’m thinking of naming the baby Emmanuel. God Good choice. Javonte emmanuel my father’s name Keisha Unless you don’t want me to. Javonte i want you to look, keisha im gettin ready to call you Keisha Just you and me? Without the bot? Javonte well i don’t know bc he says i got free will then he threatens me so i guess fake god will have to let me know whats allowed God I’ve had the conversation I came here to have. Javonte im calling you now, keisha Keisha Okay, Javonte. Javonte goodnight, fake God God :--) Keisha I told you to stop talking to him. Javonte LOL God has renamed the conversation “Emmanuel’s Family.” God has added Big Mama to the conversation. <<>>